How many times have you beaten yourself up for making the wrong decision, for procrastinating, for doing something you shouldn’t do or not doing something you should do?

You just ask yourself why over and over. Here’s why:

"The root of all desires is the one desire: to come home, to be at peace."

—Jean Klein

You just want to feel good, to feel safe, to feel at home in your skin and this world, and it’s a scary world. Life’s essence is uncertainty and it’s unsettling and uncomfortable.

We fear sickness, accidents, economic downturns and ultimately death. These are unpredictable and uncomfortable. 

Conflicts are part of human history and adversity in all forms is integral to life.

Misunderstandings between fellow humans are probably the most unsettling as they lead to intense feelings and sometimes acts of violence.

And now we are a bit more aware of the hundreds of plagues that have happened throughout the ages (bubonic, smallpox, typhus, influenza, AIDS).

Life is uncertain and we cope as we can. We make decisions to feel good in ourselves, the only ‘patch’ we can truly call home. 

We should all aim to make the best decisions we can and strive to do our best, but when we don’t, we must forgive ourselves and accept our human nature.

The way to move on from the bad decisions or the procrastination is by understanding that we just want to feel safe, to feel home and to be at peace. Sometimes that means that we make this feeling a priority rather than looking at what would truly move us forward. In the absence of safety, we might panic and make the wrong decision. We are just humans who want to feel at home after all.

And maybe we need these moments of poor judgement to truly appreciate the beauty of this world and of life itself. When a child is born, we talk about the miracle of life but then we forget that we all, once, were that miracle.

According to Ali Binazir, the probability of our existing is 1 in 10^2,685,000. That number is a 10 followed by 2.685 million zeros! Some might quibble on the exact number but the chain of unlikely events that would have needed to happen from the Big Bang to the evolution of living cells to the meeting of all your ancestors, well, you know... So yes, being alive on this planet is a genuine miracle and it makes winning the lottery a doddle! 

Imagine the change of mindset you would have if you lived your life every day remembering that you are a walking miracle! That this one and precious life is an even greater gift than you ever thought it was. 

We are not perfect though and life is not perfect but you and I are miracles so let's be kind to ourselves and try better next time. It always comes back to this: self-compassion.

Love yourself, appreciate the miracle you are, forgive yourself and try again.

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